Tooth Fairy (2010)

(NOTE: If you are eight or under, I don’t recommend you read the final section of this review) The tooth hurts. Even from the tagline to this film, I knew it was going to be a mess through and through. It was awful, but it wasn’t as awful as I would think. But granted, I was expecting a complete train wreck. Let me put it like this-I was expecting a movie that would make me want to claw my eyes out. Instead I got a bunch of fairy puns that were harmless to say the least. I didn’t enjoy it, but I’ve seen worse. A couple months ago, I saw this movie on an airplane coming from Los Angeles, and I chose not to watch it then, but was still acknowledging its existence. I figured I could do better, and continued to play Sonic the Hedgehog on my iPod. And after seeing, I’m relatively sure that I made a good decision. The film was paired with Alvin and the Chipmunks 2: The Squeakuel, and I wonder now: why do airplanes only show bad movies? And yes, this is a bad movie. But there were a few moments where one of the supporting characters got a laugh, but all of those were brought down by the typical kiddie-film crude humor and other types of extremely broad humor (and not the Spongebob seasons 1-3 kind, the Spongebob seasons 4 onward kind). The film stars Dwayne Johnson as a hockey player known as ‘The Tooth Fairy’ because he knocks people’s teeth out. He also crushes the dreams off small children, and so he is forced to serve as a tooth fairy under the rule of Julie Andrews. Later, the kiddie film formula is put to use-arrogance, change, bad comedy, things get good, things get bad, things get good again, credits. I’m pretty sure that’s how you categorize a formula film-a film where you can take the basics of most films in that genre, apply it here, and it doesn’t feel out-of-place at all. (Eight-or-under children, believers, any of that sort, stop reading right here) I don’t believe in the tooth fairy. To me, the idea is complete rubbish. I can understand Santa Claus, and the Easter Bunny (to an extent), but not here. Mythology that was handed to me as a very young child is completely trashed here, and that upsets me. A lot of this film upsets me. Not recommended.
2/10